A man can be his own take-off pedestal or his own bottleneck. It all depends on how strong his subconscious mind is. Let's learn how to strengthen our subconscious mind.

 

The appointment was at 3.00 p.m. But it was already 3.20 p.m.  Ramesh hesitantly entered Siva's office and uttered a cautious, "Sorry!"

 

There are times when the 'Sorry' from a person should be quietly absorbed. Only when mistakes hurt a person, they transform the person. When you respond with, "It's okay" to a 'Sorry', you are not providing the context for a person to feel the hurt for having committed the mistake. Then, people will only repeat the mistakes.

 

Siva's facial expressions communicated to Ramesh, "Coming late was not okay." The meeting however progressed and at the end of the meeting, Ramesh enquired, "If you are free, can I get something clarified? This question has been beating my brains ever since I started relating with you."

 

"Why do you make so much fuss about timing and punctuality? – is your question, isn't it?" Siva enquired. Ramesh smiled, nodded his head and passively waited for Siva to reply.

 

Siva shifted from the other side of the table to a chair beside Ramesh. Siva explained, "How many times we have heard this saying, 'Existential glory is that all of us are born equals. Human glory lies in ensuring we do not die as equals'. We have also repeatedly heard that every human being is made of the same inside stuff and what is possible for one human being is possible for every human being. Haven't we?  Now, be honest – have we all reached where we could reach? If all of us are made of same inside stuff, then why so much disparity in results – one man is able to produce so much, while the rest are not able to? Why, for most people maximum effort seems to bear only minimum results, while for some, minimum effort brings in maximum results? Do you have any science that can explain this? I have…."

 

Too curious and too connected, Ramesh stayed glued to Siva. Siva started. "Listen. You said you will meet me at 3.00, but turned up at 3.20. Practically speaking, the two of us are dealing with neither nanotechnology nor rocket science, for 20 minutes to make a difference. However, something beyond the obvious happens. Your 'sorry' and my acceptance of the same sets everything okay at the conscious level. However, at a much deeper level, your subconscious has made a note of this experience and so was my subconscious… 'When Ramesh says 3.00, it is not 3.00'. And in your case, these are not just isolated, but repetitive. Today, in the meeting when you said, 'I will do the project in 15 days', let me be frank with you, internally I didn't believe you will complete it in 15 days. My conscious mind is able to understand your explanations and the logic behind your projection of 15 days. But my sub conscious isn't trusting your commitment. Its past recorded observations reveal, you do not mean what you say. With subtle resistance, it wonders, when 3.00 has never been 3.00, how can I believe 15 will be 15?"

 

"Interesting." Ramesh said. "Nice concept. I am curious to know in complete detail. Please continue your elaboration."

 

Siva said, "How often have you complained to me that your wife doesn't trust your love for her completely? It is for the same reasons. You know you rank the lowest among low, when it comes to your commitment levels. Again, this is not a one-off happening, but a repetitive occurrence in your marriage. At the conscious level, she has no problems with you. But her subconscious doesn't trust you when you say you love her, because it wonders, 'Tuesdays have never been Tuesdays, 5 has never been 5, tomorrow has never been tomorrow… then when makes you believe, love you alone is love you'. The subconscious mind of your wife, even without she being conscious of it, over a period of time, has lost respect for your words. That's why, if you have observed, your son listens to your brother and not to you… ironically, your brother's son listens to you, but not to your brother.  Both you and your brother have been consistent defaulters to your own sons, but have been extra good to your nephews. After all, all of us are capable of part-time goodness, but when the same is expected of us full-time, it becomes difficult. By defaulting on promises and commitments to our children, especially when it is repetitive, we lose their subconscious trust. They may not lose respect for us, but they certainly lose respect for our words."

 

"So Ramesh, understand," Siva continued, "With every faltered commitment, we build a subconscious doubt in the other person with whom the default was committed. With every promise broken, we develop that subconscious doubt. Since, the major portion of the human mind is subconscious and only a small portion of it is the conscious mind, even if everything seems okay at the conscious level, relationships where subconscious doubt prevails can never be deep relationships. They will remain shallow relationships."

 

Siva added, "There is a greater problem to the whole thing. With failing commitments and not living up to promises, initially it will create subconscious doubts in other people and thus affect the quality of relationships. Progressively, your own subconscious will develop those subconscious doubts and when that happens, it will begin to affect the quality of your life. Every time your ambition is to make it very big in life, every time you dream of being a legend in this lifetime, your own subconscious, because of the subconscious doubts will betray your potential. In subtle resistance it would wonder, 'You can't even wake up at the time you set the wakeup call for', 'You can't even return the call your promised you will', 'You could not even deliver the material on the day you promised', 'You can't even make it to an appointment on time'…. Where is the question of you becoming a legend? That's how your own subconscious, because of the prevailing subconscious doubts, will betray your own potential."

 

Ramesh looked completed shaken up. "Nothing is lost. Everything can be turned around by building subconscious beliefs." comforted Siva. "So understand, with every commitment defaulted and every promise faltered, initially it will build subconscious doubts in the other person, which will affect the quality of your relationships, and eventually it will develop subconscious doubts in your own mind, which will affect the quality of your life. "With every commitment upheld and every promise fulfilled, initially it will build subconscious beliefs in you, which will aid you in expressing your potential, and eventually it will develop subconscious beliefs in the other person, which will aid in building deep relationships."

 

"So Ramesh," Siva clarified, "I am not fussy about time, but practicing punctuality is one of the tools to develop subconscious beliefs. With such ordinary background and simple past, if I am able to product so much result in life, it is because of high commitment levels that I practice. Living up to all commitments is yet another wonderful instrument to build subconscious beliefs. It is not about how learned you are, or how much knowledge you possess – all this sits in the memory accessible by the conscious mind, but is about how powerful is your subconscious. Your subconscious mind comprises of your most powerful workers. With subconscious beliefs they work for you. With subconscious doubts they work against you. That's why every man is his own take-off pedestal and he is also his own bottleneck."

 

Siva concluded, "That is why Ramesh, I had told you repeatedly, 'The greatest pride is to grow in your own eyes'. With every experience when you live up to your world, you grow in your own eyes and in the process build your subconscious beliefs. 'The greatest setback is to fall in your own eyes'. With every experience when you are not worthy of your word, you fall in your own eyes and in the process build subconscious doubts. Start with private promises and commitments and once the commitment muscle is built, you can go public with your promises and commitments."

 

Siva picked up a piece of paper and wrote on it, "The power of the man is in the power of his mind. The power of his mind is in the power of his subconscious mind. The power of his subconscious mind is the power of his subconscious beliefs. And, it is these subconscious beliefs that life man to his greatness. All the best Ramesh. Love you."

 

Siva handed over the note to Ramesh and Ramesh said, "15 days is 15 days. I am on my way to greatness."